Sunday, March 14, 2010

What I Have to Say About CBS 48hrs "The Girl Who Knew Too Much"

I watched the story with a group of friends. I watched as men that I haven't seen in 16 years or more showed their faces on the television. I saw the faces of Mark and Matt Abbott, Bill Ferrell, Kenny Hulshof, Leon Lamb, Shawn Mangus, Wade Howard, Steve Grah. I saw the photos of the crime scene I couldn't bear to see before as they were sprawled across the screen. I witnessed Jason Lawless show emotion and strength that will forever be a part of my psyche. I have a lot of respect for the things he said. I appreciate the way he spoke of my conviction and Ferrell's tunnel vision and arrogance. For the first time ever, I was able to see a variety of pictures of Mischelle. If you watched this story unfold, you saw what I saw....but not with my eyes. My eyes saw a sequence of very personal events and people. It was very hard for me, as I'm sure it was hard on the Lawless family .....but God!

Everyone should have heard one thing very clearly! Rick said he would solve this case. Let me make this clear. We will solve this. I'm in this fight as well. Neither Rick, the Lawless family, my attorneys, my investigators nor I will stop until this is brought to a conclusion. We will finish this. We didn't start it, but we will finish it.

Rick said he believes that people are scared of the fact that the real killer is or killers are still out and running around. Mark, Matt, Leon and others need to be scared of us. There will be a maximum security prison cell in one or more of these mens future.

Consider everything the Lawless family and I have been through. We have been beaten and battered. Two families were decimated in the course of these events. We've been kicked, manipulated, abused, disregarded by so many ......and yet. We are fighters. We're still standing! We've been knocked down, but God! What Jason says happened to his family was true, but God has something else in store. I didn't see a broken man on the television. I saw a real man. I saw a good man. I saw a man set on making this right. I saw determination in his eyes and in the eyes of his family. I'm sure they've seen it in mine.

We are no longer decimated. Bill Ferrell and the killers have lost that battle. In the end, they will lose this war. God will finish what He has started. I believe this.


  1. I was very moved by the show last night. I have never followed up on a story before, but I felt lead to try to find you and let you know I am praying for you and everyone involved in this horrible crime...your story touched me, the injustice to you, your family, Mischelle and her family...I will pray for justice for all of you. Somewhere out there, someone knows something. God's many Blessings to you and yours~

  2. Hi Josh! I was leaving JCCC a couple of weeks ago when you were out front and said hello to me. It did not dawn on me until I was down the road who you were!! You were in prison with my husband Chris Sanders and we always saw you in the visiting room prayng with Jane and another lady. When Chris called the next day, I told him I had seen you and he told me how you had been released! I watched 48 hours last night to see your story. How tragic but yet how amazing! How happy we both are for you! Traci Sanders

  3. Dear Josh, I watched 48 Hours last night and I've been talking about it all day and haven't been able to get you out of my mind. I want to say I'm very sorry for what happened to you. I know you will make up for those years in prison with a blessed and wonderful life. Because not only are you beautiful on the outside but it is clear to me that you are a good man. Listening to you speak, I was mesmerized by your quiet strength and courage. You have such a dignity about you and a light that shines even after all you've been through. I think you have a life ahead of you that will be absolutely magnificent. Your family, friends and loved ones are lucky. It just amazes me to see such good people as you, the Sheriff and Church Lady. It gives me hope in humanity. Just to see how you carry yourself after this is such an inspiration to me. Wow ~

  4. Josh-

    I watched 48 hours and was captured by this terrible and sad story. The loss of this girl was a tragedy alone but what you went through because of it was unthinkable. I am so sorry for the 14 yrs you lost and I can't even imagine having a loved one go through this as you did. You are an inspiration to us all and it makes us all see just how blessed we are. We are all a blessing from God... but some of us like you are gifts.

    God bless,

  5. I am hoping things are going well for you now that your life has been given back to you. I often think about the story I was on tv and find myself dumbfounded over how you seem to have no bitterness. You're a much better person than I would be in that situation. I would love to have a conversation with you sometime. I've been a criminal justice student for years, though in the past two or three years have lost any faith I once had on our system. You are an amazing man and God has blessed this world by putting you in it. :)